This blog contains opinions, experiences, thoughts and observations of the author from his day to day living.
It is subject to comments, criticisms and corrections, and all will be dealt with constructively and do leave your comments I would love to hear from you.
There is no intention to offend, discriminate nor degrade anybody or anything for that matter, only shared feelings, emotions and angsts at the moment.
Welcome to my world.

Monday, June 7, 2010

Until When Can You Give Without Expecting?

As Christians we were taught that Jesus said, "If someone takes your shirt, let him have your coat as well," or something like that. We were told to give more than we receive. To give without expecting, but joy, a feeling of peace and love, of brotherhood and camaraderie.

But until when? I'd say until you're bled dry. Seriously.
Let me share my point of view.
While reading the book A NEW EARTH by Eckhart Tolle, I am enlightened with the fact that we often define ourselves with the things we accumulate. We attached ourselves to many a thing of beauty, gadgetry, aesthetics and identity enhancers that once we are parted from them we most often than not feel helpless, empty, reduced to a nobody. We identify ourselves with most things that makes feel better than anyone else, unique, special, one of a kind. We love to be admired for what we have and unfortunately, not for what we are.

How is that? Let's simply put it this way, you own the latest mobile phone, with all its applications and prestige, you are proud of it, and you feel special. You depend your life on it for communication, schedules, information and what have you. Imagine losing it, imagine how you'd feel? I bet you'll be angry as hell, you'll be cursing and crying your heart out for the lost of the very thing that "defines" you.

Let's say, someone asked you to give it as a gift, are you willing to part from it? Once more,I bet, you won't. Not that we should not be giving, but the very thing that, again, "defines" you, are you willing to give it away? You won't.

Now let me ask you this question, can you realize that you'll have to let go of the phone at some point , perhaps sooner than you know? How long will it take you to be ready to let it go? Will you become less of a person when you give it away? Has YOU been reduced to a lesser degree?

Have you?

Whatever your answer will be depends on how you are attached to the very thing that "defines" you.

Eckhart said "Whenever you completely accept a loss, you go beyond (ego), and who you are." It does not mean we will let people just take whatever they want from us, but instead it simply mean that "sometimes letting things go is an act of far greater power than defending or hanging on."

So to give or not to give, it's all up to you, one can only have an open heart and mind and the sincerity to be able to give without any remorse or regret and most importantly expecting anything in return. Be careful though, cause sometimes being too giving is also another way of "defining" yourself, a way of attracting emphaty so people would praise you, which you "expect" thus losing the "sincerity" of the act.

"Blessed are the poor in spirit, " Jesus said, "for theirs will be the kingdom of heaven." - No inner baggages, nothing to hang on to, nothing to be identified with, not with things or any concepts that defines the self, being "poor in spirit." The "kingdom of heaven" is simply that inner joy that brings peace within you that is (always) there when you let go.