Why I Tend To Feel Crappy - In Response To "Will Just Keep To Myself"

I am being alienated even those whom I thought were my close friends. My world is getting smaller. I feel lonely.

I don’t want to minimize any of these things. It’s important to get it out of me and they are indeed real issues. But going through it day, after day, after day can leave me wondering what’s the point?

Now if I let myself get caught up in the drama it creates, there’s no wonder I could foresee gloom. I may take this on board, internalize it and it can really start to affect me. I start to feel really crappy.

While I think it’s important to be aware of events and what’s going on around me. I think I also need to limit what I take in.

Am I the type who really lets the issue get to me, who worries and is consumed by things that are really outside of my control? I think there is hope still, I don't have to feel crappy! With a few simple choices I can turn myself around.
In Stephen Covey’s book The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, the very first habit he writes about is being proactive. According to Covey’s definition people can be classified into two generic groups: reactive people and proactive people.

Reactive people tend to focus on things that are outside of their control, things like world hunger, the weather or terrorism.
Proactive people, on the other hand, tend to focus their attention on things over which they have some degree of influence, such as their job, their hobbies, and exercise.

The difference is worrying and getting down about things we can’t personally change vs. “minding our own business” (for the lack of a better phrase) and focusing on things we have a direct influence over.

So what can I do?

I am the reactive type of person and is tired of feeling crappy, I will try focusing my attention instead on things I can actually do something about. Practice my photography and be good at it. Try to write more, blogging, extend my circle of acquaintances and hopefully make new friends.

Instead of worrying about it and fretting over an issue I should just brush it off and simply move on.

Moping about things over which I have no control does nothing except make me feel bad, dis-empowered and perhaps hopeless. I should take a good look at where I spend my energy and time thinking. Is it making me happy or sucking the life right out of me?

I don’t have to feel crappy because of all the bad that seems to be going on around me lately. Focus on the right things and I can still make a difference and feel great about it.

I Only Pray He'd Miss Me Too

Losing a friend is not easy, especially when the reason is too shallow to even be a reason. It pains me knowing that after everything we've shared together, suddenly it ends.
I am sad, it had to end that way. I wished it was something deep for the pain would not be that much.
But it's not. I have to take pride in and let fate decide.
I asked another friend why we ended up this way, and he told me that because we don't expect them to behave that way with us, knowing that we're close, cared and love each other.I guess. I can only guess.
But the harm is done. I just have to move on, and learn from it.

And yet, still it bothers me. I will not get over this. Until when I don't know.
There's a reason for everything and whatever the reason this had happened to us, God only knows and only time will tell.

I will surely miss my friend. I only pray he'd miss me too.